


Don't Look at Me That Way

by shizus_rage



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Romance, F/M, Fluff and Angst, POV First Person, Self-Discovery, Sharing a Bed, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-16 03:42:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13627884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shizus_rage/pseuds/shizus_rage
Summary: After we left Mint Eye, an unspoken distance developed between us, practically overnight. The closeness we found vanished as if it had never existed. I couldn’t figure out what happened. And I knew that if I wanted things to change I should probably be the one to take the initiative.





	Don't Look at Me That Way

**Author's Note:**

> It's a short intro chapter, but I'd be happy to hear what you think about the POV and context and all.

People are full of contradictions. They’re determined, and then they give up. They’re careful, and then they’re careless.  
I want to be special, but then I conform. I want attention, but then I try to blend in.  
I care so much, and then I don’t care at all.  
I want to be alone... and then I don’t.

\---

He agreed to stay at my apartment, but I couldn’t tell if he was happy about it. Saeran insisted it was temporary, but I wasn’t in any rush to see him go. Although he was out often, he never told me where he was going, and it was rare that I asked.

Having lived alone for so long, I wasn’t used to sharing my space, but Saeran was the ideal roommate. He was quiet, clean, and would cook on occasion. 

Sometimes he would be gone before I woke, but normally he'd return once I got back from work. He’d usually pretend to be doing nothing, but I could tell he’d tidied, and often he’d have something in mind for dinner.

Maybe I was reading into it too much, but I wondered if he spent time away from the apartment for his own sanity, or for mine. It was probably both.

And although I did my best not to patronize him, I couldn’t help but worry. Our city was safe, but Saeran was an unusual case. He wasn’t used to the kinds of scams and manipulations that most people were able to recognize.

After we left Mint Eye, an unspoken distance developed between us, practically overnight. The closeness we found vanished as if it had never existed. I couldn’t figure out what happened. And I knew that if I wanted things to change I should probably be the one to take the initiative.

\---

I never meant to approach him when he was vulnerable, but that was what I ended up doing.

We always slept apart, but sometimes I would hear him in the other room, having nightmares. I didn’t know what to do the first time, but the second night it happened I couldn’t bear to leave him alone.

“Saeran. Saeran, wake up,” I said, kneeling next to where he lay on the couch. His hair was matted to his forehead, damp with sweat. His brow was furrowed and hands were balled into fists. He looked more frightened and fragile than I’d ever seen him. “Saeran, it’s okay, wake up…” I shook him gently.

“Oh!” He let out a strangled cry and his eyes shot open. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…”

“It’s okay. Come here,” I said, wrapping my arms around him in a loose hug. “It’s okay.”

When I started to pull away he clung to me, and so I held him close instead. His skin was cold to the touch and I could feel his heart hammering against his chest.

“Just a little longer. Let me stay like this,” his voice shook with fervent need. I wished I could see his face, but I knew he’d hate that.

“Of course,” I said in a low voice, and he shuddered slightly in my arms. “Come sleep with me? I don’t want to leave you here.”

“Okay.”

Skin on skin, I woke in Saeran’s arms, and he was still asleep. He’d taken off his sweat-soaked shirt but I didn’t mind. I felt warm and relaxed and I wanted the moment to last forever.

“Hi,” Saeran said in a voice husky from sleep. “Good morning. Sorry, I didn’t mean to latch on to you like this.”

“Don’t worry about it,” I said, turning to face him. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah, I did.”

“Are you-” I started. Probably embarrassed by last night’s display, Saeran cut off my words.

“You’ve felt so far away,” he mumbled. “Why this, all of a sudden?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say,” I said quietly. “I like being close to you.” I hugged him tentatively and after a moment he returned the embrace.


End file.
